The Soul's Damned Space

Good Morning World, yes it is me again! The long lost soul back and ready for anything that this life might throw at her. Think this time off did me the world of good and given me some much needed time to reflect on what is truly precious and important in my life.

 

I have come to the realization that life does go on whether you want it to or not, whether you are going along for the ride or just standing next to the road, hoping to God that it will stop if you don’t get in.

 

I have learnt that reality isn’t actually as scary as I thought and that even though I never wanted to believe it … my true strength lies within! Within myself and within the wonderful people I surround myself with! It lies within the eyes of my beautiful “baby” boy whom everyday teach me more about life which I could never have imagined.

 

In my time away I have taken up things that make me truly happy and challenge me as a person and as an artist. I am still writing as you can see, but I have taken up photography again, which at this moment I really enjoy, seeing that each shoot is a challenge on its own. I will post a couple of this and that’s in time …..

 

But anyway, this was my hello and I am looking forward to see what all my dear friends has been up to the time I was away. Will pop by as soon as I can, but until then …..

 

Hello world, this soul is back again ….. ready and willing for anything life might bring!

 

I am no princess and there is no such thing as fairytales. Happily ever afters only exist on cold white pages concealing the true reality of what life is all about. Fictional words for those desperate enough to believe that within the ripples of these turbulent streams that there is something more than the hidden reflections of make believe.

 

Certain people are destined for certain things, whilst others foolishly put aside their hearts to the benefit of others. Smile, the world is watching as your head barely surfaces for some much needed air. Soaking in an icy bath, numb yourself, the pain will eventually subside. All this after all is hopefully going to fade with time. Memories will always remain. The touch, the kindness will never again be the same!

 

Hold on heart – just a little longer! Maybe in the end you will beat stronger, although I can feel the pieces crumbling through hands not big enough to conceal all the blood as everything you believed in falls apart. Brace yourself; this is the beginning of a lot of tears still to come. So no use wiping them off, let them be, they are going to be there till the end of eternity.

 

Please don’t try to fool me; I am doing a good enough job of that myself. Manipulating emotions, trying to tell my heart what to expect! Disappointment for me is nothing new to begin with and trust me I have had a few. Staring mow directly into the sun, hoping its rays would permanently blind the vision of you from my eyes.

 

Now standing here, empty, I am once again reminded of a dream haunting me for so long. All the sudden breaking sounds comes to life as I feel my wings finally snap and break under the weight of a troubled mind. Thorns tightening around my chest ripping through already scared flesh! Twisting and turning, the blood comes down streaming, as I am left with one hell of a empty space in my chest as the last haunting words appears before my eyes….

 

MAI ANCORA – MAI ANCORA

NEVER AGAIN

 

Never again will I put my heart to the test

Never again will I allow the others to see, the real person inside of me

 

NEVER AGAIN

World do you hear

MAI ANCORA

NEVER AGAIN!!!!

 

 

Shadows dancing on the walls

As the sun painfully breaks within her eyes

A clever once off disguise

In an attempt of sheltering her soul from all these lies

 

Taken all that she can take

She holds her heart very tight

Knowing that this time if she should let go

Her heart would forever grow cold

 

The sunset brings no comfort

As the flames reach towards the skies

Millions of stars suddenly died

In one solitary tear from her hope departed eyes

 

Scars from a life gone by

Could never once mute her now silent cries

As a hand stretched out is just short out of reach

There is no way for anyone this barrier to breach

 

Trust lost within vast endless plains

She lays her head down hoping this would be the last surprise

Never once did she think that the knife of deceit would be twisted in so many ways

By hands she once trusted whit her whole earthly life

 

Knowing now what she needs to do

Cut the cord and watch everything come down

As the last curtain falls

With no encore to cheer her on

 

She painfully admits defeat

Bow down and greet!

Know now that the last smile was just for you

As the last letter is etched upon her tomb  

 

(c) Fragile Soul AKA Me

 

 

You left me with goodbye and open arms
A cut so deep I don't deserve
You were always invincible in my eyes
the only thing against us now is time

Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without you,
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true
If I only had one more day

I lie down and blind myself with laughter
A quick fix of hope is what I'm needing
And now i wish that i could turn back the hours
But i know i just don't have the power

Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without you,
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true
If I only had one more day

I'd jump at the chance
We'd drink and we'd dance
And I'd listen close to your every word,
As if its your last, I know its your last,
Cause today, oh, you're gone

Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without you,
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true
If I only had one more day

Like sand on my feet
The smell of sweet perfume
You stick to me forever,baby
and I wish you didn't go,
I wish you didn't go
I wish you didn't go away
To touch you again,
With life in your hands
It couldn't be any harder

 

(c) The Calling